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Know the Signs of Bullying

Feb 06, 2012

Bullying is not a new topic. Think back to your own childhood; were you bullied, were you a bully, or did you know someone who was bullied? Chances are you have encountered bullying in some form. Times have not changed. If anything bullying has become easier with advances in technology. Children are now faced with online bulling, called cyber bullying. Facebook, Twitter, and smart phones enable children to bully without being face to face with their victim. Homes are no longer a safe haven from bullies.

What is considered bullying? When one person or a group of people harm or harass someone who is weaker then themselves, bullying is occurring. Bullying can be direct or indirect. Direct refers to bullying face to face by yelling, hitting, or name calling. Indirect refers to spreading rumors. Both direct and indirect harm the person being bullied and makes the child that is the target afraid and insecure.

As a parent, what behavior or signs should you look for to spot if your child is being bullied?

“lowered school performance
school avoidance
social isolation
few or no friends
reluctance to engage in activities
loss of possessions or destruction of property
bruises or other signs of abuse
emotionality
complaints of physical distress
change in appetite
change in sleeping patterns.”

What do parents do if signs of bullying are spotted in their children?

The first thing to do is contact the school and let them know you are seeing signs of your child being bullied. Children spend most of the day at school and typically that is where bullying occurs. The school is the parent’s second eyes, and they can watch for bullying. Some schools even have a bully prevention program with action plans for the parents, children, and teachers. School librarians are tasked with teaching internet safety and cyber bullying is a component of internet safety. The school may need extra teaching in this area.

The second action to take is to talk to the child that is being bullied. The child may feel ashamed about being bullied. Some children don’t want to get others in trouble by speaking up. Open communication allow for the child to vocalize the feelings they may be suppressing on the inside.

The third step may be to contact a marriage and family therapist. They are trained to work with the family as a whole and the school system. Sometimes it takes an outside perspective from a trained individual to work with the child who is being bullied or the child who is doing the bullying.

Citation:

American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. (2012). Bullying. Retrieved from http://www.aamft.org/imis15/Content/Consumer_Updates/Bullying.aspx